4 Comments
User's avatar
John Judge's avatar

Miranda: your post is so well spoken, and so spot on. I too experienced those exhausting times when little if anything made sense, and making it through each day was an accomplishment. I wish you the best as you proceed on your journey. I will send to you my preface and intro, to let you know, there are many among us like you. My best. John

https://substack.com/@spanzj/p-162553131

Expand full comment
Miranda Ryan's avatar

Thanks for reading, John. I'm sorry there are many among us, as you say. And I'm grateful to connect. I just read your intro, thanks for sharing! And I'll look forward to reading more of your journey and words.

Thanks,

Miranda

Expand full comment
Kei Ikeda's avatar

Thank you Miranda for articulating the secondary losses! It’s so true. I can relate to so many of the secondary losses that you listed. The emergency contact thing really hit me. Grief brain is definitely real- there are just some things I can’t think through. I had to ask a 7 year old to strategize on behalf of me in a game of Cluedo! Ha! I forget things, I have to reread so many things...

One thing I have gained through grief is my intolerance for nonsense! I am getting clearer around not people pleasing, being my own advocate and not putting up with nonsensical people and situations. I don’t have the space, time or energy for such things!

Expand full comment
Miranda Ryan's avatar

Thanks for sharing, Kei. It sucks that we have all these "add-ons" to our heartbreak.

I think asking a 7 year old to strategize on behalf of you in Cluedo is a wonderful idea! I would guess 7 year olds make the best Cluedo players anyway!

I totally hear you with the intolerance to nonsense. Our energy is so limited and being used to do so much (see above haha) and so I too have limited resources for nonsense. 100% with you there!

Expand full comment